Apathetic Asshole (You Are)

"i wish you cared more"

this is what someone says to me
in a bi-yearly sit down
after they've gotten to know me
they realize the pessimism isn't a ploy
to appear ironically/iconically cool

thing is, i do care
but the things i would die for
are not present
or if they are,
they are not
a cause
a record
a painting
an idea
a project
an injustice

it is this intangible
unchanging
infinitely loving
Christ

...and that's it.