118th Street

i've tried my luck clenching my teeth when i sleep
leaving one eye open, so I can see the smoke
as it seeps into my bedroom window

the smoke clouds form a half-crooked smile
then the smile says with a lisp,
"everything is broken, and you are a ghost"

i close both of my eyes
i loosen my teeth
i let my gums bleed out
and i smile

i try all of this
night after night
in the shadows
that bury me
and my woman
between bedsheets
between winds
and layers of ice and cold water
pounding against our metal roof

but when i wake up
as the sun pours through
my rain-soaked window
we open the blinds
and we give it another try