Communion(ed)

perpetually
the heart with the crack in it
sleeps in my chest
always turns away
always seeks evil
always wants death
never wants life

today
i still know nothing
i still deserve nothing
i still offer nothing
i still receive grace

tomorrow
i will still run
but i will be chased
and caught
by this invisible ghost
who relentlessly
calls me to Himself
and murders me
with the realities
of His life and death
and resurrection

but I walk around this city
just like everyone else
like it doesn't matter
but I'm completely full of shit